Tough Talk: We Answer the Tricky Questions About College Life
Published: Friday, September 14, 2012
Updated: Thursday, September 20, 2012 13:09
College is a time when you make memories, friends and maybe some regrets and enemies. Your should be able to look back on it with embarrassment and pride at the same time.
And while the next four (or three or five years) will be full of tricky questions like the ones below, half the fun is that there’s no right or wrong way to resolve them.
You asked, though, so we answered.
How do I get my roommate's boyfriend to stop spending the night all the time? - Allie
Anyone who has ever had a roommate has dealt with or will eventually deal with this. You have to approach your roommate respectfully and reasonably and voice your discontent. It isn’t fair to say that he can never come over or spend the night, so you need to find a happy medium. This is also in your interest, as you might find yourself in her shoes eventually. How would you like it if the tables were turned?
That is one way to solve the problem, the nice way.
Here is the not so nice way:
I posed this same question to a friend of mine who dealt with the same dilemma her freshman year at ASU.
She told me that in order to keep the boyfriend away, she would flirt with him every single time he came over. The non-stop flirtation started to make her roommate jealous. So jealous that it got to a point where she wouldn’t allow my friend to see or even be Facebook friends with her boyfriend.
Long story short, he didn’t sleep over much anymore and the constant jealousy of the roommate eventually drove their relationship into the ground.
How do I get my drunken roommate to stop puking everywhere? – Sean
This is a department in which I have plenty experience.
Currently, I have a roommate who likes to urinate in people’s rooms when he gets drunk. Luckily, I lock my door every night to prevent this. However, my roommate forgot one night and was not particularly pleased to the scene he woke up to.
In my case, locking my door all but solves my problem, though if you share a dorm room with someone this isn’t an option.
Firs solution is to not let your roommate drink so much that he or she is always puking in your room, but I realize that reasoning with an intoxicated person doesn’t usually work.
So let’s just say that your roommate coming home drunk is inevitable. The best you can do at this point is to minimize the damage. Hide as much of your stuff of value in your closet or other enclosed places. This will prevent at least a few puke-related damages.
Also, try to train your roommate so that he or she at least makes it to the bathroom when they throw up. It is a lot easier to clean when it’s on the toilet or in the shower. When it is in fabric or carpet, you’re going to have a bad time.
Minimize harm and pray for sobriety.
How do I get the creepy guy that lives down the hall to leave me alone? - Kate
The fact of the matter is that there is always going to be the “creepy guy” that never leaves you alone. This year he lives down the hall, eventually he will live in your apartment complex and then he will be that weird coworker. Bottom line, this situation is tough to get rid of because what makes this “creepy guy” creepy is that he won’t leave you alone. Despite all of the signs and disinterested faces you have given him, he still thinks he has a chance to change your mind or is clueless about the way you act around him and may believe you’re into him.
The only way you are ever going to get a creepy guy off your back is to be direct. Don’t dance around the way he makes you feel. Tell him that you are not interested. You can try to be nice about it, because rejection is hard for anyone to swallow. If that doesn’t work, you have no choice but to be mean. Don’t feel guilty. He will get over it. Chances are he will just find a new girl to creep on, and the vicious cycle will continue.
How do you get the attention of girls at parties? - Mike
There really isn’t any one way you get attention from girls at parties. Every girl is attracted to different types of guys, and every guy is attracted to different girls. I know that seems like a boring answer, because it is, but it’s the truth.
In my opinion, the best way to get a girl is to be confident in who you are. Women can tell when you are trying too hard or putting on a show. Being comfortable in your own shoes is what makes you cool. Wear what you like to wear, say what you like to say and be who you want to be.
Separate yourself from the other guys at the party. Stand out. Nobody wants to date some face in the crowd that’s acting like everyone else. Make yourself memorable – in good way.
Lastly, remember to be a gentleman.
“Wedding Crasher” rule No. 96: “Etiquette isn’t old fashioned, it’s sexy.”
Now that might be a goofy line from some comedy movie, but I think there is some truth in that. Manners and chivalry are scarce nowadays, but the desire to see it is still there.
My roommate goes in the bathroom for two hours straight. How do I get him to come out? - Brent
Okay, this might be a challenge.
The way I look at it is that if this guy locks himself in the bathroom for two hours, he is obviously doing something that you are not going to want to see. He probably isn’t in there studying for his upcoming economics test, so I probably wouldn’t just barge in there to see what’s going on.
Here is what I would do.
Ask him straight up, “Bro, why do you always lock yourself in the bathroom?”
It’s a long shot, but maybe he’ll tell you or at least be aware of your concern.