College Times

Issue date: 3/20/08 Section: News

Media Credit: Photos(dot)com

When I was a young child, probably around the age of four or five, I went to the local Cost Cutters to get a haircut.

My parents were gracious enough to let me choose how I wanted to do my 'do, and there wasn't really any hesitation on my part.

My name was called, I climbed up onto the barber's chair and the hair-stylist asked me what kind of cut I wanted.

I confidently reached into my pocket, pulled out a trading card featuring my childhood hero, Suns star Kevin Johnson, and pointed to his gloriously coiffed fade.

My mother and every employee in the whole place burst into laughter. I, on the verge of tears, couldn't figure out why the thought of me - a young lad of Polish and Irish descent - having the same cut as my Afro-American hoops hero was so outlandish.

Years later, the pain of the whole ordeal has subsided (almost entirely), but my love and admiration for K.J. lives on.

Which leads me to the real purpose behind this column: I, Nate Lipka, officially endorse Kevin Johnson in his bid for mayor of Sacramento, California. Yes, K.J., a long-time Bay Area businessman and member of the Phoenix Suns Ring of Honor, has put his hat in the mayoral race in Sac-Town.

I don't usually let my political biases get in the way of objective reporting, but I'll take this opportunity to endorse all of my other childhood heroes, in advance, for the offices they should be seeking.

It's about time for Balki Bartokomous - the hilarious cousin from TGIF's "Perfect Strangers" - to finally take the reins as US ambassador to the fictional island nation of Mypos. Our fictional relations with their fictional leaders have been abrasive in recent years, fictionally speaking.

Dr. Egon Spengler of "Ghostbusters" fame is a perfect fit as chair of the National Science Foundation.

Perhaps mutant turtle CEO leadership such as Donatello's could improve Cox Communications' shoddy service?

I'd vote for Darkwing Duck over Sherriff Joe, any day.

Kevin Johnson's candidacy raises an important question. What's more disturbing: the thought of athletes and celebrities as politicians, or the fact that most of my childhood heroes are fictional television personalities?

Personally, I hereby nominate the latter.

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