College Times

Issue date: 2/7/08 Section: Daily Buzz

Media Credit: MCT

I was born on August 24, 1973. The classic horror movie Halloween was released on October 25, 1978. Five years and two months is all I had. Before I even enrolled in kindergarten, my life had been unwittingly yet irreversibly changed.

My name is Michael Meyer. The name of the killer in Halloween is Michael Myers. Similar? Undeniably. Exactly the same? Not quite. But why let a pesky little "s" (not to mention the absence of an "e") get in the way of nearly three decades' worth of smirks and lame jokes.

Barely more than a decade later, in 1989, a young Canadian improv comedy actor named Mike Myers joined the cast of "Saturday Night Live." You know the rest: Wayne's World in 1992; Austin Powers in 1997. Suddenly, the already infinitesimal percentage of people who have never heard of the killer from Halloween have a new point of reference when they hear my name for the first time. Sweet.

I'm sure there are thousands of guys in the world actually named Michael Myers, and you know what? I envy them. At least at the end of the day, they have to say "Well, it sucks getting stupid comments about my name every day, but then again, my name is Michael Myers." I don't even have that cold comfort. I'm sure there are guys out there named Freddy Kroger or Dana Carver who know what I'm talking about.

So just when I thought I'd heard and seen it all regarding my name, I get an e-mail late Friday night from another Mike Meyer. But not just any other Mike Meyer. This Mike Meyer is a journalist. Who writes about music. Specifically, heavy metal music. We've even written about the same band (The Black Dahlia Murder - they're badass, look them up) within days of each other.

You've got to be shitting me.

So to make a long story short, Mike Meyer wants me to not be Mike Meyer anymore. And in all fairness, Mike Meyer has been at this music journalism gig for a lot more years than I, Mike Meyer, have. So out of respect to Mike Meyer, with this blog I, Mike Meyer, hereby renounce the name "Mike Meyer" and reintroduce myself to the world as Mike R. Meyer.

Oh, and ladies, the "R" stands for "RRRRRRRRRReally sexy." Oh behave.

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