Natural toothpaste sucks, but it's way better for you

By: Lauren Kawam

Posted: 6/26/08

I have been using natural toothpaste for about a month now, and I would just like to share this with you: It's utterly disgusting.

I purchased two kinds: one from Trader Joe's (their brand) and one from Target (Tom's of Maine brand), but I don't think the brand matters that much, because I am convinced that natural toothpaste in general sucks ass, and I'm about half done with both of the tubes.

Now, I know what you're thinking, "Lauren, why do you keep on brushing with this gross stuff if it really is that nasty tasting?"

I'd say something like, "Well, if you care enough about your precious mouth to read the back of your 'regular' toothpaste tube, you'd see it's chock full of chemicals and fake sugars derived from something inorganic. I don't know if that last part is true, but I do know it's undeniably silly to be brushing away sugar and plaque, with - of all things - a paste made out of sugar!"

Then you'd concede and say I was right. But, I digress.

What I'm really writing about is how truly repugnant this stuff is. I'm convinced that the way they make it is - they take a shit load of baking soda, mix it with water until it's pastey and then add some peppermint flavoring. But, just enough so that you can't really taste it, but they can list it as an ingredient.

Every time I get ready to load up my toothbrush to clean my pearly whites with either kind, I cringe with repulsion at the thought of putting something that disgusting tasting inside my mouth.

And the pisser is that you have to use almost double the amount you'd normally use with the pointless "other" paste, because is dissolves so quickly in the awaiting saliva pooling inside your mouth, because of its natural-ness.

But, through my wincing faces, I do it, because I'd rather trigger my gag reflex three times a day brushing with the nightmare that is natural toothpaste, than brush away the bad stuff with more bad stuff.

Jump on the bandwagon and try it; you may not like it, but at least it's better for you.

That's not crazy, is it?