College Times

Issue date: 4/16/09 Section: Blogs

Media Credit: Photos.com

We've heard it a million times, after a while relationships lose their spark and people fall out of love, get stuck in a rut or lose interest. So how do you make sure you're not the next victim of relationship demise? It's all about putting in the effort to keep things strong. It's natural that over time the two of you will get more comfortable and, in turn, may not think it's as important to try as hard as you once did. The surprise flowers and cute lingerie may be a distant memory, but it's up to you to actively bring that effort back.

While you might be secure in your relationship, though exhausted from school or work, it's important that you take time to show your partner how much you care. Although you've been together for a while, it's still important to compliment and indulge each other.

Sometimes my boyfriend just wants to hug; he's a big hugger! It's so sweet but I'm often distracted and I find myself saying, "Not now babe. I'm doing something." Then I think about how lucky I am and the fact that one day I might not be able to hug him, and on top of that, I need to make sure I'm making him happy so he doesn't find someone else to go hug. It sounds a little '50s, like please your man, but it's a two way street. You need to make each other happy.

Another thing that's fun is just to make out like it's your first kiss again, because after time you find that your once junior high make outs turn into pecks on the lips.

A lot of times relationships get in a rut where you're stuck doing the same things over and over. Just like everything in your life, it's important to constantly mix things up and grow. On weekends, road trips are great for re-kindling. I know they don't exactly sound like the most romantic thing in the world, but on a college budget, they're a great way to explore the state and spend time together. Sometimes it just takes some time away for the two of you to get that spark back.

The drive allows you to talk about all the things you've been too tired and busy to talk about over the week, and studies have shown that guys have an easier time opening up when they're sitting side by side with someone, like in the car, rather than face to face. The fun situation of a weekend away allows you to let go of your everyday stresses and remind yourself of why you love each other.

In the meantime, try to mix it up in some way at least once a week. Maybe come home with a surprise present, or go on a date somewhere you've never been, get creative in the bedroom or just talk more. The effort you put into each other will not only keep you happy, but your relationship, too.

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