Spring Break
What's the Rush?
Jillian JamruszkaIssue date: 8/13/09 Section: Sex
My boyfriend and I have been dating for five years and, while it sounds like a long time, I still have no desire to take it to the next level. Don't get me wrong, I eventually want to marry him, but what's the rush?! I can barely afford to throw a party, let alone a wedding; but still, people are always questioning us about when we'll take that step.
Why do people think they have to fit in this American timeline of: go to college, get married, buy a house, have kids? That's so old-school! Besides, 30 really is the new 20, and how anyone settles down in their 20s is beyond me; but different strokes for different folks, I guess. It may work for some, but in your 20s you're still figuring out what you want in life.
I see friends settling down and I'm not sure if they're doing it because they're ready or because it's what they think they should do. All I know is that rushing into things can cause you to make mistakes that you'll later regret. In your 20s you may feel madly in love and that's great, so be together, but take this time to practice, play house and see if you still feel the same way about each other after that.
I've seen people rush into kids and marriage only to later find out that they can't stand each other. I know it sounds depressing, but it's something that's important to think about. You might be infatuated with someone and think that you want to be together forever, but instead of being careless, try it for a while first. Practice splitting chores and expenses since these are the little issues compared to kids. See if this is a person that you could actually live with. You must realize that it's easy to have fun with someone when you have no worries, but is this person someone that you can rely on? You might find that his or her fun and easy going attitude is not so charming once he or she begins slacking on responsibilities and leaves you with all the work.
What if your college crush doesn't step up just because you do? In your 20s, you're still very young and it's common to still want to go out to party.
It's a time in your life where a lot of things change. I'm convinced you go through a second puberty in your 20s with all the life realizations and changing body parts! Anyway, you might realize that you don't even want to have kids anymore, or that you want to quit your job and travel. I've recently seen both of these things happen to my married 20-something friends, and guess what, it was a little late for that news!
It's amazing to me how delusional love can make you. I'm shocked by how many people I know that don't use any form of birth control. It's like some irresponsible part of them does want to accidentally get pregnant because they're so into their partner now, but that's all fantasy. So whether you're 18 or 30, don't worry about your age number. There is nothing that you HAVE to do. You have your whole life to settle down, so don't rush anything now that you'll regret.
Why do people think they have to fit in this American timeline of: go to college, get married, buy a house, have kids? That's so old-school! Besides, 30 really is the new 20, and how anyone settles down in their 20s is beyond me; but different strokes for different folks, I guess. It may work for some, but in your 20s you're still figuring out what you want in life.
I see friends settling down and I'm not sure if they're doing it because they're ready or because it's what they think they should do. All I know is that rushing into things can cause you to make mistakes that you'll later regret. In your 20s you may feel madly in love and that's great, so be together, but take this time to practice, play house and see if you still feel the same way about each other after that.
I've seen people rush into kids and marriage only to later find out that they can't stand each other. I know it sounds depressing, but it's something that's important to think about. You might be infatuated with someone and think that you want to be together forever, but instead of being careless, try it for a while first. Practice splitting chores and expenses since these are the little issues compared to kids. See if this is a person that you could actually live with. You must realize that it's easy to have fun with someone when you have no worries, but is this person someone that you can rely on? You might find that his or her fun and easy going attitude is not so charming once he or she begins slacking on responsibilities and leaves you with all the work.
What if your college crush doesn't step up just because you do? In your 20s, you're still very young and it's common to still want to go out to party.
It's a time in your life where a lot of things change. I'm convinced you go through a second puberty in your 20s with all the life realizations and changing body parts! Anyway, you might realize that you don't even want to have kids anymore, or that you want to quit your job and travel. I've recently seen both of these things happen to my married 20-something friends, and guess what, it was a little late for that news!
It's amazing to me how delusional love can make you. I'm shocked by how many people I know that don't use any form of birth control. It's like some irresponsible part of them does want to accidentally get pregnant because they're so into their partner now, but that's all fantasy. So whether you're 18 or 30, don't worry about your age number. There is nothing that you HAVE to do. You have your whole life to settle down, so don't rush anything now that you'll regret.
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